Monday, March 21, 2011

The Power.

It's strange what a week can do to someone. I sit here writing this post, knowing that the power and the fury that raged within last week has disipated from me, I'm still lonely, I'm still down and miserable, but I'm not letting it take me to the depths it was last week.

Has writing helped? Perhaps? Has knowing people have been supportive helped? Perhaps? Have I done anything to help myself? Perhaps? I don't know what the key to it all is, all I do know is that I'm no longer on the edge of things, I'm very much calmer and yet things haven't changed one bit, I'm still broke, I've still got no job, I've still got very few friends, but I'm no longer seeing the darkness.

What ever has happened, has been good, I'm obviously in a much better mental position, and maybe by Wednesday afternoon, I may be even better, but I'm going to do something other than write, I'm going to talk about it. I hope I find that as easy as writing perhaps. Still we wait and see, but it's been good to let the emotions go, but lets wait till we get past that to see. So this week offers, little or no different to the last, just applying for jobs and coming to the library. Let's see if anything changes and I get an interview, lets see if I can get a change of luck. Oh that thing called luck, the one thing that my life has never had.

Oh and I'm being told my sister wants me to contact her, well that's strange considering how much she's gone out of her way to avoid me, to ignore me. Well it's not for me to do that it's for her.

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