Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Nelson Struck

Well, it's been a few days since my last post, it's not that I've had nothing to say or that I've been too deep within myself to write, no it's been down to Nelson that I haven't written. Who's Nelson I hear some of you shout, well I do think it's Admiral Nelson of the British navy I'm talking about. So why did he prevent me from writing when he's been dead near enough 200 years??

I've mentioned how we Brit's love our cricket, well for some reason the score of 111 is named Nelson, and is considered bad luck. Most cricketers or those involved in cricket will have a little superstion to get through that little passage of play when Nelson is scored. Unfortunately I couldn't really do that on here could I? So after the Nelson post on Friday I was hoping for a good day.....

Well as predicted George Best died on Friday, which though expected wasn't exactly good fortune, it's left Manchester feeling a bit numb to be honest. Even though he was Irish, we still regarded him as one of our own. Still everything else went ok, I went out with Lisa to the Trafford Centre and did some window shopping, and then we went to Rusholme for a curry. It was a really nice curry and of course being in Rusholme really cheap. So a bit of bad luck to meet Nelson, but nothing major you say!!

Saturday morning I wake up to see how the Oilers had gone on againt Calgary and what do I find?? Nothing! No power to my pc or monitor. I'm unsure of the reason, as the plug rack that I've got my pc on, is working fine and the speakers and external modem is working. Maybe the power pack had gone? I don't know a quick look inside doesn't shed any light on the matter. I think perhaps a fuse in the plug had gone, but as the other plugs were working and the rack were working I discount that theory. So it's wait for the shop to open and take the pc in. I then went to the big Tesco around the corner and buy a couple of hairdryers, as both my mum's and my own had blown over the past few weeks.

I get back to my mum's go wash my hair and come down, go to use one of the hairdryers and it cuts out on me!! This is now turning the Nelson post into serious bad luck mode. I get the other one out, which works fine. No problem in my head, as of course my pc will be ready later in the day and I can go and replace the hairdryer. I get no phone calls from the pc shop, so I call them back and the pc is working, but they want to carry out some further checks it won't be till Monday the pc is ready!!! No pc for the weekend, it was like losing my right arm. All I had was my radio to keep me company in my little flat. So I spent a lot of time at my mum's watching tv.

So without going into many a detail from Sunday, which involved going to the pub to watch United play there first game since the death of the legend that was Georgy Best, which they won. Coming onto Monday morning, I had a supervision meeting at work with my line manager. That was going to be a popular meeting as I had plenty to say and she in turn had plenty to say to myself. It was, how to put this unpleasant viewing for both parties it seemed, and though I took a battering I gave one out as well. I guess that's what supervision is all about.

Anyway, come the end of the 2 hour meeting, I get down stairs in the office and phone the pc shop, and they are happy for me to have my pc back, with no repairs done, as they've found nothing wrong. I took my power lead up, and lo and behold the reason for the problem was discovered, the fuse in the power lead plug had gone. So I went out bought some and replaced it and the pc is working again. I feel so stupid over this, it's unreal. Add to the fact I took the hairdryer back and they tested it at the shop and it worked. They did say that they'd experienced that before, so it made me feel even smaller, than previously.

Still it's done and I've got my pc back and a new hairdryer. Oh and as for the weekend, it was great apart from that! I saw plenty of Lisa, went out for a couple of meals with her, and went to the cinema on Saturday to see Flightplan, which wasn't bad, but it wasn't the greatest film and I wouldn't pay over £5 to go and see it again.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Nelson

So here we are at the end of another week, another week filled with beauty, anger, happiness and sadness. It's going to be a week, where the world will lose a genius. Flawed genius, but a genius all the same.

George Best, will I guess be dead within the next 24 hours, at 59 years old a young death for a sporting superstar, who shone as bright as any. For all you hockey loving readers, George Best is only comparable to Wayne Gretzky. He had everything you want from a soccer player, with it he added, good looks and charm. He had the choice of women, and the press loved him. Unfortunately he found solace in alcohol, and this is what has cost the world the life of this genius. My thoughts go out to his family and friends. Supporters of soccer everywhere will mourn his death and we in Manchester will mourn some more.

So onto today, I'll have to go into work today, as I never got to say goodbye properly to Vicki yesterday. She leaves today and is heading off to Winnipeg for 4 months next week. I know I'll probably see her in the future, but it's still not nice letting her get away with leaving without a goodbye. She's done that one before on me, and for someone to whom I class as a dear old friend it's not acceptable on my part for letting it happen. I'll miss her being around though we've failed to chat properly whilst she's been back with us at Barnardo's.

It's going to be a good friends day today though, as Lisa is on her way home for the weekend and tonight we are going to the local shopping mall to have a look around and then go on for something to eat. Tomorrow night we may even go into Manchester for a drink or dance, I'm not 100% sure but what ever we do, we'll enjoy ourselves and let our hair down together for a change. It's been a while since we last did that, but it's going to be fun. Both of us have reasons to let everything go, and that always makes going out and enjoying yourself the better.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Courage

It takes courage to see look at oneself and to suggest you are not good enough, but that's what I've done. I feel almost relieved that I've done such a thing. I can now move forward and relax a bit. I've been a bit down of late, as can be seen in the last few posts, and that is mainly due to what has been going on at work. Well I've just sat down and written a letter of resignation, to which I can add or delete items from. I've given myself a few days to see what happens, but this is it.

With that done, I feel as if a great weight has been taken from my shoulders, is that normal? I think it is the fact that I've done something about my situation and one which I'm sort of happy with. I shouldn't be happy as if I walk it's over 19 years of work down the pan.

Still who cares? I don't anymore, it's more about me than it is them. I've got to stop allowing myself to be dragged down into a mire every time something goes wrong. Enough of the people within the project have chipped away at me of late and that's the straw that has broken the back as such. I can't let them get to me.

So onto other things? Well not a lot else has taken place, though I did spend some time with my niece last night. As my 1 to 1 didn't want to go and see Harry Potter we finished early and so I got home to find her there till around 8pm. That was around 3 hours of her being around. I enjoyed it as much as she did, and even if my mum and sister were not happy with some of the things we did, it was fun. Message to everyone, don't play football in the house! Now we didn't break anything, but we could have and I'd have been shot for it. Though the cheek of it, I was accused of being a one trick pony with the football. How can you do anything in a space of 2 yards?? That was the width of the hall way, while the length was greater, we had the stair case to cater for and coat stands. It was to narrow to do anything. Mind you my neice has only just got into football, so it's ok for her to accuse me I guess.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Same Old

Well as forseen in the mystic eyes of mine, last nights group went as well as previous weeks. Again a child was very ill, sent by school, when he really should have been sent home. I can understand school wanting him to come and them wanting to keep him there, but at the end of the day they have medical staff in the building if anything goes wrong. Having worked on both sides of the fence I'm sort of caught in a very difficult place, trying to appease my current employee's and also trying to work with my past colleagues.

I'm now aware though that change is afoot, this can not continue. Last nights planned activities went out of the window again and has left me very low. I was accused the other week of losing heart with this group, to which I angrily reacted as it was wrong. Now though if I were to be asked again in the next few days I'd have to agree. No matter what I do and who I try to correct things with this group, it doesn't work. I'm convincing myself that it's my fault and that I'm doing a bad job. Even after working on Saturday, and being able to say I can do the group thing, this has knocked that confidence for 6 and more. I'm probably at my lowest ebb with this now. It's at a point where I've written a letter of resignation, which will only be used if things continue to go the way they are.

That of course is a course of action I don't want to take, but right now it's one of the only possible ways out of that group. I don't know what I'd do if I were to do that, but I've been in that position before haven't I!! I know of a possible job at my previous employment i.e. the school, but could I go back there? I really don't know, but the position that I've seen advertised or should I say the job description that I saw being written out could be an interesting development, depending on the wages and prospects.

I've got a supervision meeting on Monday with my line manager, and it's there that I'll be thrashing around all the ideas that I can to try and sort out the group. She's aware of the problems of the group, but it's her that is also the cause of some my moods towards the group and the ideas she's had for the group, has gone against the way the group should be run. I'm getting lost in the tunnels that is my inner thoughts right now and should try and find a way out, before I say something that I shouldn't and also before I get so deep that I start to effect the way I'm going to be today. I could unintentionally write myself into a nice depression which would effect everyone around me. I don't want that, I'm trying to keep happy right now, it's hard enough with everyone else throwing bombs at me without myself trying to do the same.

So what else has gone on? Well not a lot to be honest. I got home and watched the football at mum's last night, which was ok. I'm not being as critical of the team these days as it's obvious that should this team win anything it will be sweeter than ever. They'll have had to work hard for it, unlike previous years when they've just had to show up to win things. That's the sports report as such. When I'm so concerned about work, sport is one of things that I can use as a get out of jail card. Last night though a generally boring and typical European game, it was enough to take my mind straight off work and onto something else. I just wish it had been powerful enough to maintain that through till now.

At least it's half way through the week and even if I've got to go and see Harry Potter for the 4th time tonight, I'm not that bothered. I'm sort of hoping that the child I've got doesn't want to go to the cinema to be honest, but if that what he wants, then that what he shall get. I've worked hard to get him back on my side and it's now starting to show the rewards. I really do want this to work out, and want to help this child get more out of life than he currently is.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

It's Tuesday Again

Apart from stating the fact, the title says it all really. It's the day of my group, the one which is causing so many problems. Today we intend to make the pots which we were due to do a few weeks, back but couldn't as we never had the clay. I hope it goes well this afternoon, but everyone has to pull together and I'm going to have to really work the group hard. I'm gearing up to running the group on my own and having little imput from the volunteers. I don't like doing that, but it's going to be the way, till I'm happy with the way the group is working.

I'm going to change around some of the volunteers as well, to see if that can help with the way it's running. I'm going to get objections I know, but I don't care.

I'm a little scared to be honest, but hey if it works then all the best. Of course after the group I've got to take the two children home. That's going to be fun, more so this week as one is around the corner from Old Trafford, and we'll have 67,000 people trying to get to there tonight. Which could delay me getting home, and missing some of that match. I certainly hope not.

Work yesterday was good, even if it did mean going to watch Harry Potter for the third time. I guess I know the film off by heart already!!! One of the former drivers came in to see everyone and that was good. I've not seen him for a couple of years and he's one of the characters, which made it all the better I guess. We had a chat about old times, and that of course meant that some of the team couldn't join in that well. I don't feel sorry about that as they ailenate me from things so it's a two way thing.

Anyway as I come to the end of the work base post, just a thought goes out to Jiri Fischer, he collapsed on the Detroit Red Wings bench last night. He required CPR, and was then transfered to hospital. It seems he's awake and talking right now, but of coruse it's never nice to hear stories like this. Get well soon Jiri and see you on the ice sooner rather than later.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Missed Season

Wow, it's cold.... Ok, for all you people in Canada and possibly Denmark, it isn't that cold, but it is for this little girl. This time last week, I was seriously concerned that most of the tree's still had leaves on, all be it brown, but still on the trees. Then last Thursday we had a drop in temperature, and the leaves began to fall. As I look out of my window right now, the tree in vision has only a handful of leaves left and it's a very cold and foggy morning. I hadn't put the fire on in the room till last Thursday, and right now it's going on with regularity.

At some point it's gone from being summer to winter without touching fall. It's certainly crazy mixed up weather we're having. I know that the weather forcasters have been predicting a cold winter, but this has come as a jolt. Still once I get working I'll be fine, but of course I'm feeling the chill. I can tell just by the speed at which I'm typing and how many mistakes I'm making. It's difficult to get the fingers moving. So, it's back to drinking lots of hot drinks and also heating the room up every now and again. It didn't help opening the window to try and and get a picture of the above mentioned tree.

I guess while I'm talking about weather and seasons, here's my theory about it. None of this theory is sustainable in terms of facts and figures, but still I believe it. From what I recall as a kid, and we all do that don't we, fall used to start in October, last untill mid November and then winter would kick in. For those of you who stumble across this from the southern hemisphere please transfer winter and summer around. Anyway, back to the theory and seasons past. I've noticed over the years that winter has started to come later and later, and that fall lasts longer than ever.

Global warming can be held accountable to some extent, but for me the possibility is that we in the Northern hemisphere seem to swapping positions with the Southern hemisphere. By that I mean, when we should be in winter, we are getting weather more accustomed to fall, and when in spring it's more like winter. Is the earth changing it's axis? I can't back this up, but the more I think about it, and recall how things were I get this voice saying it is possible. Still I'm only a little girl with no scientific evidence to back up this, so take it as you will.

In terms of me, my health seems to be being hit by the weather. I'm in need of going to the doctors at some point in the next few days to get checked up. My shoulders, legs amongst other things need to be checked. I don't tend to go to the doctor with just 1 thing wrong, it tends to be 3 or 4. I've also noticed this weekend, what seems to be either a tooth or reminents of tooth at the back of the gums where they extracted the wisdom tooth a few weeks back. That needs a check up of course. I blame my mum for that, as she's got a similar problem, and she has had false teeth for as long as I've been alive. This is quite odd.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Passing By

Well it's Sunday and time is going by like the train at the level crossing. It's way too long to judge, but interesting to watch. Today is very much a lazy day, no need to rush to mum's to take her anywhere and I've no other commitments to undertake. I have decided to allow myself the chance to let things pass me by, as over the past week or two I've let too many things effect me.

I can recite this tale here, out of jealousy, but it's true. I had a meeting to attend on Friday at the local Special Ed high school. Ok, there are two, but they are in the same building, but that's another topic completely. Anyway, here I am going to the one I had been told to go too, when I'm told that the meeting has been changed, to the other school, but as they are joined it's no problem, just a 20 yard walk to the room. After signing in, and meeting a couple of people from work, and a couple of people who had organised the meeting, we sat down. One of the organisers went to obtain something for the meeting, either milk or water for the drinks.

On her return, we found the real reason why we'd been moved... NEW ORDER, had arranged a concert for the children in the other part of the school. Had I known, and had I the option, meeting or a New Order concert which do you think I'd attend?? Of course New Order!! Most of us in the room would have been very happy to have done, so, but instead of being able too, we had to go along with the meeting. Now then why would New Order, one of the UK's biggest bands, and one of the worlds most iconic bands play a small special ed high school gigg?? Well the story goes that the manager needed to speak to his daughter at school, and didn't know the number. So he looked up the number in the phone book, but got confused by the fact that two schools had the same name. He was so impressed by the work they do, and the fact the band is big on Salford and Manchester helped this concert come off.

I've spoken to a few of the children who attended the concert, and all they can say is how good they were. It just makes me even more jealous of them.

Apart from that Friday I went to see the latest Harry Potter film, it wasn't bad, but it does have huge chunks of the book missing. It's awful really, but then what can be done? I mean it really isn't possible to do the whole book. I took my neice and mum on Friday and then yesterday morning with work, as I was working this weekend we went to see the film again. I've got another 2 sittings of this film to undertake this week. I'll have seen it 4 times in the first week, not that I'm big on Harry Potter, but I think 4 times in a week is almost Star Wars like geekishness for me.

I've somewhat calmed down since Thursday, but I'm still not happy with the way things are going at work. I think that I need to further examine everything, but now I've got a calm, I need to maintain that. Yesterday went well, and I'm pleased to prove to myself that I can run a group and not make a mess of it. Everyone enjoyed themselves and that included the volunteers. I can do this and I will do this. It's that group which is the problem, not me. I'm now convinced of that, and I'm going to keep trying to convince myself of this. I'm not going to let my line manager tell me otherwise. I can run a group, I can do it very well, but this group is just full of tangable children that it's impossible to plan anything.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Fleeting

Well it has been fleeting, but it was ever so nice. My spell of happiness at work has come to an abrupt end. Whilst still trying to be positive about what I do, it seems that what ever I do I do wrong. I can't do anything right.

The biggest problem area is my group. I've said before that this group is considered to be a problem group by many outside of work, and at the school I used to work at. Now this group is getting worse. I don't know what I can do to make it work again. I'm trying every trick and turn that I can to make it happen, but it just doesn't want to go, it's like the square trying to fit into a circle. My line manager know's it's a problem and wants to take a child off the group and make them into a 1-1, which would be better for him, but she wants him to still come out on the group and be a "part of the group". I'm sorry, but it's just going make things even crazier.... I'll go along with this, but just wait till it goes wrong.

I'm being told that the group isn't to go out again and that we need to become a base group, but that's not what the children want, but if that's what the order is well and good. I know that I've been failing the group, and that I'll try and make amends in the coming weeks, but it's very hard. I think I'm going to have to go into hyper mode, and go right over the top to make this happen. I don't care, from next week we are going to see me taking on the whole group and leaving the volunteers with as little to do as possible. If I get told to back off then, I know I'm a failure and to look for a new job. It's very sad to say that, but I'm just about convinced that I'm failing more than ever. I'm no good at what I'm doing.

Where does this take me? I really don't know, as this is something I really didn't want to consider, I've always considered myself to be good at this, and have been very confident, but I'm very rapidly losing that confidence. I'm going to try and rediscover that confidence or my life will be lost and I'll have no hope, no career or no future. It's like a red hot iron tearing through your heart, but I've got to stand up and realise this. I'm an adult now, nothing is preventing me from doing anything, my past has gone and left me. Now is the time I should be grasping the tail of my future and this just isn't happening right now. Perhaps a chat to the people that know me best, but that's getting increasingly more difficult.

Still you never know what's around the corner, something good might pop up and shock me. It normally does, but hey that's life I suspect.

A strange but true thing just happened. As I was about to sign off, this post. With talk of past and future, I'm here at a mid point in my life. The song that just hit my music player is.....

Midlife Crisis by Faith No More....

If ever a more apt tune could have been chosen I don't know about it.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Flying Time

I know the phrase "Time flies when your having fun" can be true, whilst on other occasions it can be a little less truthful. This time it's a mixture. I have been quite chipper this past week. Ok for all you non Brit's, this is more a term for feeling quite ok, nothing spectacular, but good. Work has proven to be consuming, even though it only seems like yesterday that I was taking the young person I've got today. It's flown by, and though no excuse for not posting in many ways I'm going to use it. I really hadn't realised it was last Wednesday when I posted last.

So since then things have taken place, things I never thought would happen for a long time. For the first time in years, I had my hair cut, by that I've had inches taken off. It's gone from the small of my back to just below my shoulders. It feels so much better, and though I'm a little sad to see the length go after so long it's really refreshing to have shorter hair again. How long before I go and repeat this is up to me, though perhaps I'll have some colour put into my hair next time, so brown highlights, to compliment my natural colours of black and grey.

I'm going to sound like my parents here right now, but I don't care. This past weekend has seen the world remember those who lost there lives in the First World War and any subsequent wars since. While I'm not a lover of war, and for some of the later wars I've got no problems with the deaths of soldiers, for example in Iraq. I do have problems with those from previous wars where conscription meant that no matter if what you had to go and fight. That's just me though. Anyway at this time when our thoughts are with those departed, we had a soccer game played between Argentina and England, two countries who in the last 25 years have fought a war against each other.

By all accounts the UN wanted to make this a game for peace, but this isn't your ordinary teams, there is a history between them. The UN officials are in a state of shock over the fact that the Argentinian's sang songs about the English prior to the game in the dressing room. So what, if it helps motivate them so be it, it was an old folk song, openly sung whilst Brit's had ranches in Argentina. It isn't much really, but the UN have spoken out about it. What the UN have failed to comment on, was what made my blood boil.

The English fans, openly singing throughout the game "What's it like to lose a war?" and "You'll never have the Falklands" towards the Argentinian fans. It's a disgrace, on a weekend when we are remembering the dead the English are glorifying war. No matter what the Argentinian players sang, this has to pale into insignificance to the English fans. It's this type of fan that gives the English a bad name, yes singing songs to wind up the opposition fans is all well and good, it's part of the game. What isn't part of the game is going on about the dead. I was so angry that I wish England had lost the game, I really do feel strongly about this.

Enough of my moan, it does sound like my parents, but I really don't care. I am proud of where I'm from and yes that does mean putting Salford before Lancashire, and Lancashire before England. I presume many would reverse that, but not me.

What else have I done? Well not much really. I was hoping to see Lisa this weekend, but we didn't get chance and didn't get chance to have a chat even though she was back home. I'll email her later on, but apart from that nothing. I relaxed over the weekend, doing not a lot and almost pampering myself to much. This week I hope flies like the last and things get into a pattern. It's all the more fun to be busy than not. I now realise just how under used I was at school.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Blast

Well this week has flown bye, but I'm not complaining that's the way I like it, and by the time I get my feet on the ground it will be the weekend once more.

I should start this paragraph with a word on the big soccer game last Sunday. United played Chelsea, which in it's own merit is a big game, but as Chelsea are now the champions and United the challengers who by everyone's account have fallen behind it was a much bigger game than normal. It was such a blast to come out of the ground on Sunday with the 67,000 others having enjoyed a great game of soccer and a win for United. I know that I'm biased, but that was such a good game, played in the right spirit and the crowd got behind the team, at times the whole experience left goosebumps all over. I've been in better atmospheres at the ground, but this was so unexpected and so refreshing, long may it last.

Work has gone ok so far this week, but I'm only half way through it and have the rest of the week to do. I guess the big news from work is that the project manager will be leaving us in January. Ok, so the head boss is going, but as he's been there near enough 17 years it's going to be strange not having him around once more. He's been there nearly as long as I have, I remember meeting him for the first time, as a 16 year old kid at school and chatting over previous playscheme's and finding out that he'd replaced the person I'd worked with the year before. I wish him well for when he leaves, but it's still a bolt out of the blue that no one had seen coming.

In terms of work and what has gone on, my group last night wasn't as taxing as it was last week, but it was still a little on the shambolic side, but that's the way the group is. The children are of such like that trying to tell them to sit down and wait for there turn at bowling is very difficult, and of course when you get others bowling all around you, it's important that you try your hardest to get it done. Then when you have others joining you, it just adds to the mess. Still no one was hurt and we got back to base on time, I am however going to ask my line manager to ask those who were there of what they think about my group, and then to ask her to come out with us. Maybe a little re-organisation could be needed.


Sunday, November 06, 2005

Time To Write

I guess after 3 days of no posts and plenty of idea's it's time to write another post. This post is going to go down a path, which one though I don't know so hold on tight and enjoy the ride.

Well this week went well, I managed to get all my hours in at work way before Friday and though I had to work on Friday it wasn't a long day and I was home for 12pm. I should add extra hours onto my time sheet, but I'd only get in trouble for that and so for once I'll keep it at the 21 hours that I should have worked and say no more. I know that in time to come that I'll possibly regret doing that, but hey it's me and I always make mistakes like that.

Friday didn't go quite to plan though, as I started to watch the entire Star Wars story, but only got through the first 3. Still it's good to have seen the entire prequal trilogy in order and though not as good as the original trilogy, it's still a good set of films when watched together and I guess that's how they were supposed to be watched.

I'm feeling quite refreshed for some reason, I know I've not been away and I've not really stressed myself out of late, but I've done very little this weekend, though I did manage to get my mum to eat Sweet Potatoes. Well I made chips out of them and gave them to her without telling her, and she liked them. It's the best way to do things with my mum. Give her something don't tell her what it is and then when she says it's ok, tell her and shock her. She's such a fussy eater that this way at least we tried something with her and she's got the chance to say she doesn't like it. Normally it's I don't like that or fancy that, just going from the name or the look of something.

No it's been quite a relaxed feel to the weekend and I'm chilled out with that. I guess that come later this afternoon and nearer to the big soccer game I'll get a bit nervous and tense, but hey that's just that. This though is a quiet contentment. Something I rarely find, so I'm treasuring this weekend.

Work next week should be fun, I've now got a child or group on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. That's 8 hours of my 21 sorted without me even moving a muscle, and if I throw in an extra 4 hours for preparation that leaves me with 9 hours to fill. That's no problem on a weekly basis I know from experience. So for the time being I shouldn't find it a problem filling my hours in at work. I'm happy with that, but of course it means that I'm now tied down in terms of what I can or can't do in the near future. Though of course 1 of the children will be moving into a group soon and thus leaving me a space.

I suppose I should go and get ready shouldn't I...I would like to go shopping, or at least call at the local Aldi to see what they have on offer and pick up some of the stranger food products they have on offer. I've got to say that I do enjoy a shop in Aldi every now and again. It may be cheap, it may not be the greatest of shops but they do sell the odd thing that I enjoy or at least make things affordable.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Go Ahead

Well it didn't take long for those of you who read this page to take it over the 1000 visit mark. Well it did and didn't, but I think 100 posts and 1000 visits is a kewl enough barrier to past together. Thank you all again.

So what's new? Well not too much, though I've now got a date and city for the forum meeting that I have been co-opted onto at work. I'll be off to Bristol in January and I'll see what it's like down there before deciding if I want to stop down there or not. It's not that I don't want to, it's money and what's going on.

I've got the go ahead from work to do so, but they want me to feedback on what I'm going to be doing. It should be interesting to say the least, but I think that the meeting in a couple of weeks might be of more use to me in that respect. I do know that there isn't a strategy in place to deal with those service users who have major learning difficulties and also are exhibiting behaviour which suggests they have a sexuality issue. It's a grey area of work, but one of which is a big challenge for myself to look into, and more so at work. More will follow on this topic as time goes by and I hope it can not only help those service users, but that I can help in a way establish stratagies for work that people can follow after I've left.

Socially wise nothing to report, things have been quiet, though the breaking local news is that a major soap star (here in the UK, and to a point world wide) has taken over my local pub. It had been shut for a couple of weeks and is due to be reopened on Saturday night. I'm not going to make a run to go in just for the sake of her, but as I do go in often with work and also to watch soccer, it won't be long before I see what they have done inside. I'm eager to see what the refurbishment has done to the old place, I just hope it remains a pub and not a bar. They destroyed my previous local, by transforming it from a pub to bar.... I've not been in that place for near enough 3 years now. It's a shame as I liked that place.

I shall me thinks be going Geekish on Friday. If I manage to get my hours in at work today, I won't have to go in tomorrow, which is all well and good as I may sit down and watch all 6 Star Wars films. Geekish it may be, but it does need to be done and the sooner the better as far as I'm concerned. So if I can fill the hours in and I only need 4 hours work today then I'm not up for being disturbed tomorrow.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Centurian the White Rabbit

Well it's here, the month of November and perhaps more significantly the 100th post of this blog. I didn't know where I'd be taking this thing when I started, I did say that it would be a journey rather than a walk around the block. It's been something of a help to me at times, it's been a nightmare at times, but I'm glad that after a break around the months of April and May, that I came back to here and got into the routine of posting something here on a regular basis.

May I once again thank JANET for the inspiration to begin this journey. It was reading her blog, which made me choose to begin here. I need to thank everyone to whom I've come in contact with over the time since I began. Without them, I'd have little to write about and even though I could make this interesting about my past, and I'm sure that it would be a good read, this isn't about the past, this is about the present. My past is gone, it has an effect on who I am and how I am seen by the rest of the world, but it's the present to which I'm concerned about.

I can't link anything to Lisa, to whom I owe so much. Without her though, I doubt I'd be here to write this and I guess that's kind of important.

Ok, so what has been going on then since the last post?? Well I was due to go shopping with my mum into Manchester on Sunday morning, but as the weather was rather nasty we decided against it. Not that we chickened out, it's just that with Manchester being so much in the open, it was perhaps better to go another day. Plus, as my mum is meeting up with her sister in Manchester on Wednesday, it was felt tht two trips to do the same things in a matter of days would be pointless. So we went round Salford instead. Now Salford shopping centre used to be ok, it was different to the nearer Eccles centre when I was a kid. Salford had proper shops it contained a Marks and Spenser and Woolworth. It was a bus ride away, but it was somewhere different.

As time went by, both the shopping centres of Eccles and Salford went into decline. Shops left both places and some shop spaces never got filled. With the construction taking place of the near by Trafford Centre, no one really wanted to open a shop next door to what was then Europe's largest indoor shopping mall. It would be financial suicide. So today, both Eccles and Salford offer a variety of shops the likes of which 15 years ago you wouldn't have guessed. The amount of £1 shops and charity shops is crazy, but they must be making a profit as these shops have been there for at least 5 years now. It's very much a place to grab stuff rather than going to the big supermarkets with. The shopping centre's have taken over the local corner shops in many ways, which is sad as the corner shop was a place of vital importance to the communities.

Enough of the social aspect of life and back to Sunday. Once we'd done the shopping, home we went and a spot of watching some classic tv, ok so perhaps Robin of Sherwood, isn't a big classic, but as a kid growing up this was staple Saturday night fare for a few years. I've rediscovered it this year, and though it's aged a bit, it's still fun to watch. Sunday dinner was made for mum and I, whilst mum was out. All that we needed to do when I got back from picking her up was to serve it up.

Yesterday at work was a bit mad in many ways. I made arrangements to see someone at 5pm, forgetting that I'd already agreed to cover another members of staff's work at 5.30pm. It was a good job I remembered as it was around 2.30 in the afternoon that I did so. Only 30 minutes before I was due to collect my own service user for a session. Had I not recalled this I'd have forgot and would have got into a bit of trouble. Luckily, on arriving at the 5pm appointment, I was able to rearrange this for Thursday, and thus saved the bacon as such. Though I spent more than I would normally yesterday on the service users, more so the extra work in the evenning I'm not going to complain. The person to whom I worked with is one of those people that you get on with easily and one who's gone through more than any 11 year old should have.

Today's plan is simple.... I'll try and get an appointment for some beauty treatment for this morning shortly. Once I've done that, I'll get ready, go to the appointment and then back to work. I've got a team meeting before my group tonight. After all of that it's straight to the shops to purchase the latest Star Wars dvd. Which reminds me to see if I've got enough hours left with my over time to claim a day off either later this week or late next week. I want to spend a day watching all six Star Wars films in order. I know it's geekish, but to hell with what the rest of you think, I like Star Wars, and though I'm not obsessive about it. Well I'm close to it, I can do what I'm like, I'm an adult by law. Some would argue that, but I am.

Just as an after thought, and one that I picked up with after originally publishing this post, I'm only around 20 veiws of this blog having been visited 1000 times. Even if it means me jumping up my own counter, the next entry will only come after that total is met. So tell anyone who you know reads this and possibly enjoys it to do so to get the next entry up sooner rather than later!!!!