Saturday, June 02, 2012

Not A Word

As the light drags on outside, time passes by slower by the day.  Maybe it's me I don't know, however over the past week or two the days seem to be getting longer and longer.  OK, I know that is factually correct as we move towards the summer equinox and the longest day of the year, but it feels so much longer of late.  

I'm finding myself more and more bored as the night passes and so I'm going to have to do something about it, I'm not sure what but I will.  By writing tonight I'm going fill about 20 minutes or so, I don't plan what I write, if I did it wouldn't work, so tonight is a filler entry as such one to fill time.  It isn't working as I'm finding myself trying to think of what to write.  

Here's something I hadn't realised, I've spoken a word to anyone today, and not even said anything out loud to myself.  That is sort of odd, as I normally say something at least once all day.  I'm now sort of wondering do I say something or not?  Shall I break the silence or attempt to go a day without saying anything.  It feels odd though, it really does and it's making me feel rather isolated as now I've identified it, it's playing on my mind.  How could I alter this? Well by going to the shop to pick up anything just to get me into someone's company, but you know I don't know if I want to do that just to alter that.  It is a very strange place i find myself in with this. 

With the drop in temperature I've pulled my window closed as well, and that's heightened the sense of silence as I can't hear anyone on outside, not that they would be in the rain.  Yet, all I've got is my room. Self motivation is required I guess, but it isn't in bucket fulls, and that's seen through out this blog is it?

It's now June, half way through the year, and it's flown by in many ways, we've still got a long way to go but crimes in just over 3 months time it's going to be my birthday again.  It's flying by, in 3 months time the Olympics will have been and gone from the UK.  I've waited all my life to see them on British soil and I can't afford to go.  It's sort of soul destroying, every 4 years I have watched them as much as I could, 24 hours wall to wall sport, and the one time I can go in the flesh I can't afford it.  The closest I'll get is seeing the torch pass through Salford and Manchester.  Maybe, maybe I'll find a job soon, or win the lottery.  If that's later is the case then I'll be off to Russia in 2014 for the winter games, getting tickets if I can for the ski jumping, ski and board cross and of course the hockey.  It's a dream I guess, but if one can't dream then one shouldn't be around.

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