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It's been a weird day today, nothing seems to have been alright, no matter what I did something always went wrong. I'm not sure why, as I've felt so good about things yesterday, and yet right now, I'm alone in my room and feeling rather miserable.

Perhaps, it's an image thing, perhaps it's just the way I am? I really don't have much of a clue on this one right now. I wish that I could remain positive, but it's just not happening today. I really should do something, but in fairness what I want to do is something I don't want to do. I want to go make something to eat, and enjoy it. Having concluded that I want to diet, I've got to stop eating snacks as such. I've got to cut out lot's of things, I've got to start exercising again, but I don't. Self motivation is lacking and that is something that scares me. I never did feel bad about getting on my bike and riding miles, I never was scared of doing some form of exercise, but right now I am. I'm not over weight, most people will tell me that I am ok, but then I look at them and think no, your way thinner than I am, and I've got to get down to being like that. I consider myself fat, ugly and unlikeable. I don't LOVE myself, I don't LIKE, myself. I accept myself, but that's about it.

This isn't good, this isn't positive, I don't need a break right now, I've just had one. I don't think this has anything to do with work either, this is down to me!!