Friday, October 12, 2007

Am I to Blame?

I know it's been a while since I put anything up in here, but I've been away for a few days since I last posted and also I've been and still am ill since I last put anything up here. I did post a couple of photo's over on the sister site, but hey that's easy enough now through my mobile phone. However to post here means I really should use my PC rather than any other medium.

So I've been to Newcastle and Birmingham/Coventry, I put the other two up as the place I stayed in Meridian is actually in between both places and as such isn't a big place that you'd find on the map. It's only a small village, though it does seem to be inhabited by people with plenty of money.

Anyway I came back from Newcastle with a heavy cold, and though I thought I was beating it, by Tuesday night in Meridian, I realised that in fact I hadn't beaten it, but if anything that had beaten me. I was desperately ill due to problems with the bedding and my chest. What ever the problem left me open for the cold to strike back and it has with a vengeance. I've also caught a case of conjunctivitis which I'm not impressed with. I've got some ointment for that, but it's like a tube of yellow goo to put in your eye. It looks as if I've been crying for weeks without stop right now.

Not that I've not cried at any particular point over the past couple of weeks, considering the moods I've been in of late. I certainly cried up in Newcastle and I wish I hadn't, the thing is I'm getting to the point of wanting to share myself again, gone are the days of me constantly wanting to hide, but that part of me is still around, and it's really odd trying to figure out which part of me will jump up at the start of the day. Which ever it is that is truly me, I want you to know that I would like some company and soon, it's very lonely right now and no one ever seems to be able to give me the time of day or company that I desire. I'll go out of my way, but perhaps I've got an eye for luxuries rather than your every day deals that would do as good a job. So perhaps I'm to blame?

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