As a new day begins, I ponder what will happen, how I'll fill the time and yet some how I always find something, and that's a positive. Something is a positive, as being repetitive can be a strain, it can be a negative. Not that routine isn't a bad thing, but for me I find that I like to do things differently.
So today begins and whilst I've got an idea about what I want to do, it's more than likely not going to happen. However should it happen, it could of huge consequence to myself and that is making me feel a little nervous, a little scared. I don't blame myself for feeling like that as what I hope to happen could lead to my world tumbling down, or relief that I can move on and not pretend anymore to someone. Those that know me, may be able to fathom out what I mean from that, and though the plan remains a secret of sorts, as it's not a guarantee to take place, it's not going to be published yet. I don't know why I would want to do this, I don't know why I have had this idea now, but I'm going to go with the flow of things and see where it takes me.
Perhaps I'm tired of the fighting, and this is the first move in a longer game to reconcile with others, but I doubt that should this plan take place and the out come be what I think it might be, reconciliation would take place. Who knows the plan may happen and things might not move on, it's got potential to move the situation and potential not to. This is all very cryptic, I am aware but be sure that should things happen from this, either positive or negative then I'd write a entry either later tonight or more than likely tomorrow morning.
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